the journal

If there's a hell, my name is probably somewhere near the top of the list.

Of course that shouldn't be surprising. I'm a seventh year Slytherin and am expected to join the Death Eaters. I'm to become a sort of version of my father. Expected to carry on his work if he ever dies. If he dies he can go to hell, too.

Hopefully I'll be a smarter version of my father, if it comes to having to be him. Theodore Nott is not a stupid man, but I like to think I'm a little more tactful.

But if I wasn't destined for a tortured afterlife, if there is an afterlife, then I certainly am now. I was in the Astronomy Tower and Laurel showed up. She's dating Lestrange. Even if he is an insane asshole, I probably shouldn't have feelings for his girlfriend. Or feelings at all for anyone.

Truthfully, it's a little scary. I don't think I've ever felt like this for anyone before, and it's really, for lack of a better phrase, freaking me out.